Dr. Erika Rasure of Beyond Finance screenshot from "Talking to Family & Friends About Your Debt"

Video: Talking to Family & Friends About Your Debt

ByStella Martin

In this 2-minute video, Dr. Erika Rasure, Beyond Finance’s Chief Financial Wellness Advisor and Financial Therapist, shares:

  • The importance of sharing your financial situation with someone trustworthy
  • A step-by-step guide to help you have that conversation

Transcript of Video:

Talking about money can be uncomfortable because it’s still considered a taboo topic. And when it comes to conversations about debt, feelings of guilt and shame can make it even harder. 

But carrying that burden alone can eat away at you. Unburdening yourself of the truth of your financial situation with friends or loved ones can bring a tremendous amount of relief, and even a sense of empowerment. 

Now, you don’t have to share everything with everyone. Focus on people who’ve been supportive and uplifting of you in the past, and share only what you’re comfortable with.  

Here’s a step-by-step guide to help you have that conversation: 

  1. Prepare yourself. First, accept that you can’t control how others will respond. It may not go as you’d hoped, but simply taking ownership of your situation is powerful.
  1. Create a starting phrase. Practice saying something like, “Hey, I want to talk to you about something I’m going through.” Repeating it out loud can make you feel more prepared when the time comes.
  1. Reaffirm the relationship. When you start the conversation, express gratitude for the person. For example, “I really value our friendship and appreciate your support.”
  1. Be clear about what you need. Guide them by stating what you’re looking for, like, “I just need you to listen, not give advice right now.” 
  1. Communicate changes (if needed). If something needs to change, be upfront. You might say to your adult child, “I need to set a boundary with money — it’s not about you, but I’m in a situation where I need that cash now.” 

It can be scary in the moment, and you can’t control what other people do, but most of the time, the outcome can be really good. 


You deserve a support network. And you deserve people in your life. You deserve the calm that being authentic brings, of actually telling people what’s going on, and allowing them to show up for you.