Navigating Financial Grief: Finding Yourself Through Change
In one of our recent weekly client Financial Wellness Sessions, Beyond Finance’s financial therapists, Dr. Erika Rasure and Nathan Astle, explored how grief shows up in our money lives — and how we can move through it with self-compassion. Dr. Rasure shared:
“Financial grief is really that emotional pain and sense of loss that comes from something significant happening in our life … money is multidimensional and it touches every dimension of our lives.”
Financial grief can follow job loss, divorce, illness, scams, or simply the reality of debt. These moments shake our sense of safety, self, and future — not just our bank accounts.
Grief as a Process, Not Just a Feeling
Astle reframed grief to help us understand why it feels so overwhelming:
“A lot of people use the word grief for emotions like, ‘I’m feeling sad or angry’… but I think it’s more helpful to think of grief like a process … a process that we move through in order to help us cope with change.”
Change can be massive or small — but either way, grief isn’t a tidy sequence of stages. It’s our mind and body adjusting to transition.
Why Debt Feels So Heavy
Dr. Rasure noted how often grief is intertwined with debt:
“When you find yourself in the financial condition of debt, there’s often other life situations … And while there’s grief and loss in being in debt itself, there’s also grief tied to the life experiences that led you here.”
Dr. Rasure then explained that because money is taboo, this grief is rarely acknowledged openly:
“If you’re grieving because you’re in debt, we don’t talk about money when it’s good, so we’re not going to talk about it when it’s a little wobbly… a lot of people are not seeking support or resources for that.”
Tools for Moving Through Grief
Astle walked clients through three steps they could take to move through their grief and heal”
1) Find Your People
“Grief makes us want to isolate … But the thing that really helps most people — I might actually argue all people — is other people. We need to have support systems that are empathetic.”
2) Create Rituals
“Rituals can be small things … kissing your partner goodbye, watching your favorite show, praying before bed. Rituals help your brain get used to the idea that there’s a change happening.” – Nathan Astle
Astle shared a ritual of his own — ice cream sandwiches that connect him with his late grandmother.
3) Lean Into Creativity
“There is no such thing as an uncreative human being. Creativity is something we all have.”
Writing, drawing, music — even Legos! — can give grief a place to move and help you reconnect with who you are.
Honoring Change, Honoring Yourself
Dr. Rasure shared:
“The biggest choice you have to make around grief is to let yourself go through it. Go through it, honor it for what it is, and honor yourself in the process. You are strong, you are malleable, you are worth all of the good things in the world.”
Astle concluded:
“Grief isn’t linear… The only way out of grief is through. By having people, rituals, and creativity — and by giving yourself compassion and grace, there are ways to get through it.”
✨ Takeaway: Financial grief isn’t a personal failure — it’s a natural response to change. Naming it, seeking support, building rituals, and creating can help you move forward with resilience and care.